To Change The Things I Can

  Change.  It comes unpredictably for the most part. It's something we all have this desire to control, but it's a force of its own. Sometimes change is voluntary, sometimes it's slow and steady. Then there are times when change is like a huge storm, hitting you out of nowhere and making you feel like you're drowning and can't catch your breath. It's like a roller coaster you're stuck on and all you want to do is get off. It can turn your life upside down, make people you love and are close to complete strangers, and leave you standing in the wreckage not knowing where to begin on the road to recovery and finding normalcy.

Change is never ending. Everything changes. The key learning to adapt and move forward. Sometimes change is good. Sometimes we need to make changes in our lives for the better. Other times change can be the worst. But you have to remember life can change in an instant.  As you grow older, oftentimes you are forced to make changes alone. You and your friends go separate ways but that’s life. You have to do what’s right for you. The people that truly love you will understand. Trials make us stronger. Change helps us grow

 How fitting that the season 4 finale of “Private Practice” was titled To Change The Things I Can. Addison Montgomery has been the poster girl for change ever since “Grey’s Anatomy” and now on “Private Practice”. Addison has had to handle and make changes she caused, didn't cause, liked, disliked, and had no control over. The thing I love most about her is that she is this gorgeous, lovable character that isn't perfect (like the rest of us—except for her perfect red hair and style). She struggles with change and choices like you and me. Addison has been in multiple relationships--from Pete to Sam and the others in between  Dating can be frustrating. There is no map to finding your true love. You have to take risks and chances when it comes to love. Many single women of all ages can relate to Addison's relationship situation. The fact that she's refused to give up her dreams and settle with any of the men she's dated is admirable. She knows what she wants-a family and baby, like so many others-and will wait until she finds him. 

What I adore most  is how Addison learns from her mistakes and gracefully grows from the changes that surround her. When it comes to her patients, she always advocates for what she believes is right even if she's standing alone and causes disagreement between fellow doctors and friends. Addison refused to give up on Oceanside Wellness group and would do anything to save it. Sometimes it's better to start over than to go back and fix what is broken. I loved the quote in the finale, “We start over. We start fresh. We start clean. We stay a family. We make a change for the better.” Addison remains hopeful and optimistic despite the chaos threatening the practice and her friends.

 The lovely Kate Walsh has also experienced her share of change—good and bad. She is not only a talented actress, but I also considered her talented at handling change and remaining positive even when the changes she is experiencing are challenging. Her parents divorced when she was only six, forcing her to move at least ten times. I know that I (and thousands of others) can relate to divorce and the trials that follow it. Kate didn't let it stop her from accomplishing her dreams. She proves that despite the circumstances you can't change, you can change the way you see them and react. 

 She inspires me to change the things I can and let go of the things I can’t (and be okay with the fact that you can’t change everything). Kate never gives up or lets change bring her down. She has said she relates to Addison in this respect. In her own words “I’ve always been the girl who keeps on trying.” When you are threatened by change, turn the change around, make your own change. You might not be able to change the world, but you can change your world and not let setbacks define you. Anything worthwhile is never easy. The best things in life are worth the wait.